listen i know each actor brings their own spice to a role, but i just can’t take timothee chalamet’s wonka seriously
where is the madness behind his eyes??? the malice??? the complete disregard for the laws of mankind and decency???
this man makes me fear that i’ll be shoved into a taffy machine at the slightest provocation
as! he! should!
i think also people who dont understand how "stacking some rocks sometimes" can be harmful have heard of the countless cases where "its just a little thing" has destroyed countless landmarks and parks
elafonisi's pink sand beaches only retain 10% of the pink hues they used to retain just a few decades ago,
(source)
and if you didnt know it could happen, a larger scale upheaval of a beach in jamaica actually did result in the disappearance of an entire beach.
(source)
pig beach in the bahamas attracts people for being, well, the bahamas, and native pigs in the area can be found swimming to get around sometimes. people go nuts for the photo opportunity and forget these are wild animals- and youd expect it being the pigs killing people, but actually, people being too friendly caused a ban on feeding the pigs because seven of the poor things died after people figured "how bad could it hurt them if i give them just one?"
(source)
and these are just cases of something specific happening or being taken or given. thats not including people ruining and closing down entire tourist attractions, beaches, and parks by completely overcrowding it, disregarding rules, or trashing and littering the places.
like if someone preserving the park tells you not to do something you think is "harmless," i swear they arent just doing it because they want to ruin your fun. maintaining these places is delicate work- its a privilege to see and visit these areas, not a right. please take care of the world around you whether youre very close or very far from home, okay?
as much as the concept of Jesus being a fairly normal lad has its charms, im personally very intrigued by the idea of him being just… extremely weird. not even in a mystical sense, just…….staggeringly BIZZARRE.
you go to the well to get some water, and here’s Miriam’s boy, staring at the sky, completely still. his expression is unreadable. you hazard a hello and ask how he’s doing, and he slowly, unblinkingly, lowers his gaze on you (he’s 8 and is missing his frontal teeth, not that this is making you any less uncomfortable) and says “I cannot speak of the state of my being, Nathan son of Saul, my brother, but rejoice for the water you shall take today will be as pure as the soul of the children of Heaven”
…you start sweating
normal person in 1st century Nazareth: making my way downtown, walking fast
*sees J boy, 8 yo, staring at you from across the street*
normal person: walking faster
even funnier, the only person 100% on board with his Prophetic Kid Talk is his mother Miriam, an otherwise placid, absolutely normal woman around 25 or so
kid JC, coming home at twilight, a single white dove following him and chirping with weirdly human-like precision:
Miriam: ! that’s my little boy :) now let’s go get ready for dinner :)
her husband Yosef, a carpenter who only marginally got signed up for this:
This post is so Christian, but it’s the spicy kind of Christian that gets you murdered by other Christians for heresy, so I’m torn.
literally biggest form of compliment i’ve ever gotten
that means the angels are babysitters then
here have more
You guys really need to read Christopher Moore’s Lamb, if you haven’t.
Always reblog Cryptid Jesus
I made more. cause it’s fun
I love that you guys used their actual names
I did not consider Eldritch Baby Jesus.
Tuira Kayapó brandished her machete in the face of a government official who was trying to convince indigenous leaders to accept a mega-dam project in the Amazon, 1989
“Electricity won’t give us food. We need the rivers to flow freely. Don’t talk to us about relieving our ‘poverty’ – we are the richest people in Brazil. We are Indians.”
also! she’s still alive! that sort of thing is always worth pointing out to show that we really aren’t too far removed from events like this! here’s a 2019 photo of her:
every time i have salmon it’s like. bears are right. i would also stand in a stream for this.
johnathan-harker-apologistThey are also right about: honey, berries, napping all winter, and lack of pants. So really, bears are just living the best life possible.
shout out to gay men
i rember when i was in high school, hearing a teacher say “lebron james is rich, the guy who hands him his paycheck is wealthy”, and i think that that’s a really simple illustration of wealth and class that a lot of young leftists these days do not understand
i see a lot of young leftists these days thinking that “having a lot of money = oppressor”, which shows a fundamental misunderstanding in how social classes and the dynamics of power in society work, and as a result they go after actors, athletes, even youtubers, but the thing is most actors, athletes, and youtubers don’t actually own capital. actors don’t own disney or warner bros or 20th century fox, athletes don’t own their stadiums or sponsorship companies, and youtubers certainly don’t own youtube or advertising companies that sponsor youtube channels
many highly successful actors, athletes, and youtubers DO start their own businesses once they’ve amassed enough wealth, but it has to be understood that the large majority acquire their wealth through paychecks given to them, rather than through owning the means of production, and it’s the owning of capital that really determines who runs society and who doesn’t, because it’s those who own the means of production who gets to decide the affluence or poverty of those who don’t
The real reason that sex scenes in traditional fantasy erotica tend to involve bathing in improbably convenient crystal-clear pools is that fantasy writers and readers on the whole are the sort of people who won't bat an eye at wizards and dragon, but would be terribly bothered if the text didn't explicitly address the obvious consequences of whipping one's unmentionables out after spending weeks on end traipsing across trackless wilderness in full amour.
